50-Word Stories

American Idol Variant #21

Tim — Thu, 02 Sep 2010 16:16:16 +0000

“Yo, man. I thought Randy carried this song. You got a great low-end range there, dog.

“But Paula, you were pretty pitchy, and Simon, honestly, work on your rhythm. You missed, like, half your cues!”

“Wow!” said Ryan Seacrest. “This is exactly why we’re doing American Idol: Judge the Judges!”

Rating: 3.0/5 (2 votes cast)

Mr. Mannequin

Tim — Wed, 01 Sep 2010 16:59:17 +0000

Mr. Mannequin was not a particularly outgoing person. He was more concerned with the latest fashions than with making social contact. He was content to let others pass by and stare–in jealousy of his fine wardrobe, he was sure.

On Wednesdays, he tidied his master’s secret laundry-room genetic engineering laboratory.

Rating: 0.0/5 (0 votes cast)

Foiled by the Cutesies

Tim — Tue, 31 Aug 2010 17:23:53 +0000

“You fool of a henchman!” cried the criminal overlord, with a mighty sneeze. “I’m allergic to cats!”

“But he’s such an itty bitty pretty kitty, isn’t he? Such a cutesy snootsy bittle snookums…”

“You fool!” cried the criminal overlord, with a mighty cough. “I’m even more allergic to lovey-dovey gibberish!”

Rating: 5.0/5 (2 votes cast)

STEPHEN PESTER: King Rigel

Tim — Tue, 31 Aug 2010 06:49:13 +0000

King Rigel watched as the ship drew out of sight.

The officials on board believed themselves bound for the Outer Lands. But the King knew: when the ship passed the base on Vallanger, the royal navy would completely destroy them.

Rigel sat back on his throne. He loved being evil.

Stephen Pester is a student from London with a completely unremarkable life which therefore leaves him stuck to find two sentences to write about myself. He guesses this counts.

Rating: 0.0/5 (0 votes cast)

She Was A Teenaged Aardvark Sculptor

Tim — Fri, 27 Aug 2010 22:21:04 +0000

Her works were renowned throughout the world. She was a teenaged aardvark sculptor, the greatest that ever lived. She worked with stone, ice, and clay: every medium was her domain, subject to her whims.

She hid in anonymity, each masterpiece a portrait of self-loathing, of her wish for human form.

This story was based on a title suggested by @VikkieTheMimm.

Rating: 5.0/5 (1 vote cast)

The Man Who Couldn’t Stop Breathing

Tim — Thu, 26 Aug 2010 15:50:06 +0000

His mighty lungs seethed with an expansive power that rivaled the greatest operatic diva. His inhalations were vortexes. His exhalations were hurricanes.

His breath was like clockwork, a regular, rhythmic, unceasing alternation of perfectly balanced forces.

It was this, alas, that caused his tragic drowning death in the kiddie pool.

This story was based on a title submitted by @inzyster.

Rating: 5.0/5 (5 votes cast)

American Idol Variants #14

Tim — Wed, 25 Aug 2010 17:04:51 +0000

“Now I know my ABCs,” crooned the little girl, “next time won’t you sing with me?”

“Awesome!” said Paula Abdul. “You’re going to Vegas!”

“But I wan’ go home!”

“No.”

“Isn’t this exciting, folks?” enthused Ryan Seacrest. “Little Kimmy’s going to be our next finalist on American Idol: Toddler Edition!”

Rating: 3.0/5 (1 vote cast)

Todd Was Not So Brave

Tim — Tue, 24 Aug 2010 16:52:17 +0000

Todd had several seconds to contemplate the feeling of free fall. He was surprised to find that he hadn’t passed out. Maybe he was braver than he’d thought!

The instructor joked, “What would you do if our parachute didn’t open?”

The rest of the descent was warm, wet, and awkward.

Rating: 3.0/5 (2 votes cast)

JAMES HESLIN: I’ll Take Care Of It

Tim — Mon, 23 Aug 2010 20:33:20 +0000

She moves past you. You see pain.

He gets on, sits beside her. Both uncomfortable.

An awkward exchange, both speaking at once. He wants to “take care of it.” She acquiesces, nodding silently. He gives her his card.

He disembarks, then she.

You look at the seat. Paper scraps everywhere.

James loves Linux, gaming, and, apparently, fifty-word stories (who knew?). Find him at http://skynet.ie/~program9.

Editor’s Note: I’d love to hear other people’s interpretations of this story. I know what I think it means, but I think it could be understood in a lot of different ways, which is really cool. Offer your explanation by leaving a comment!

Rating: 5.0/5 (2 votes cast)

The Happies and the Slappies

Tim — Fri, 20 Aug 2010 22:24:27 +0000

Once there was a village of Happies. They loved life!

But the mean Slappies bullied the Happies until they became Unhappies.

One of the Happies awoke the wise Nappies. The Nappies gave some puppies to the Slappies, who loved them so much that they became Sappies.

Then everyone was happy!

I’m glad the Sappies are happy, but hanging out with them can be so uncomfortable. They just sit there and pet their puppies and make cooing noises and talk in baby voices and rub their noses on their puppies’ noses… Blech.

Rating: 5.0/5 (4 votes cast)