Like before every job interview, he could feel the sweat staining the armpits of his blue shirt. He buttoned the top two buttons of his suit, then decided to unbutton the first. “Don’t stutter, don’t mumble. Be confident,” he whispered to himself quaveringly. “Okay, Shirley, send in the next candidate.”

Grey Joyner is a Brown University student who often has contests with his father on who can come up with the best 50-word story.