You ripped out my heart. That wasn’t very nice.
I do appreciate your thoughtfulness in replacing it and stitching me up afterwards, and my new eyeballs work great, thanks, but would it have been too much trouble to remove these huge bolts from my neck, while you were at it?
This story was based on the prompt “ripped out” at TypeTrigger.
Glenda sashayed into the house pulling an overflowing shopping cart.
Trevor nearly fell off his chair. “What in the world? Where’d you get all that butter!?”
“I was couponing,” explained Glenda, “and I got on a roll…”
“What are we supposed to do with it!?”
“…Put it on some rolls?”
Death is an unsettling experience. The sudden weight-loss, poor circulation and depression has been known to drive many victims of death into suicidal states and impractical levels of homesickness.
Experts on the often fatal condition recommend emergency surgical obliteration of the brain as the most effective and efficient known cure.
Since his last submissions, Gavin has been writing for his local University and upholding a (mostly) weekly blog of his writings. He is quietly contented with life.
“When I was much younger, I could bench press a fat man!”
“Oooh!” said my granddaughter, eyes twinkling.
“Yep, your grandpa’s pretty strong! And even though I’m getting older, I bet I could still do it, if you gave me a chance.”
My granddaughter said, “I can do push-ups, too!”
This story was based on the prompt “much younger” at TypeTrigger.
He had the eyebrows of a Greek god.
He kept them in a vacuum-sealed glass display case, mounted onto a simple plaster bust, and reluctantly loaned them to museums for a few months every year.
Few people noticed that these months always coincided with The Olympian’s annual vacation from superheroism.
This story was based on the prompt “the eyebrows” at TypeTrigger.
“So you say you gave birth to a… dinosaur.”
“Yes, doctor.”
“And that’s him, there? He looks quite normal to me.”
“He’s a dinosaur, really!”
“Well, if he is a dinosaur, when I place my finger in his mouth he should—HE BIT MY HAND OFF!!”
“I told you so.”
This was story was based on a title suggested by @Keab42.
“You look terrific,” she told him. “Fantastic, even.”
“You know,” he said, “I *feel* fantastic. Maybe even marvelous!”
“Whoa, hold on. I don’t know about marvelous… Fantastic is one thing. Marvelous is something else entirely.”
“Oh.” He shuffled his feet awkwardly. “Well how about… wonderful?”
“Sure, I’ll give you wonderful.”
This story was based on the prompt “fantastic” at TypeTrigger.
Clarence played his brand new clarinet very loud: Phweeee!!
It made his little sister angry, so he played it even louder: PHWEEEEEE!!!
In a puff of orange smoke, a genie appeared. It said, “I’ll grant you two wishes.”
Clarence wished for an even louder clarinet, and a pair of earplugs.
Rancid breath washed over him, spilling out from behind a mouthful of long, sharp, yellow teeth.
How had he ended up here, with his head halfway down a lion’s throat? “Exciting Opportunity,” they’d called it. “The Adventure of a Lifetime.”
He sighed wretchedly and gathered a long string of floss.
This story was based on the prompt “yellow teeth” at TypeTrigger.
“Woah, what’s that?”
“A titan of eternal torment and fire, birthed from the maw of hell, knowing nothing of love or life, seeking only the end of all that has ever been and ever will be?”
“Yeah, but how did it get here?”
“You forgot to shut the door, Einstein.”
Brandon King is a volunteer for Leading Edge Magazine, an awesome sci-fi/fantasy publication that will publish and/or edit your short stories, poems, or artwork.