Tag Archives: funny

KAY RAE CHOMIC: The Locked Cloest

Amusing, Artistic, Submissions, , ,

Vincent unlocked the door to his closet of collectibles—clothes from his favorite people long dead. He walked in and spent an hour wishing he had help to select an outfit to wear on his last day on earth. He walked out in his birthday suit and thought it suitable.

Kay Rae Chomic, novelist (A Tight Grip), and writer of flash: Ellipsis Zine, 50-Word Stories, LISP, Cheat River Review, Cabinet of Heed, Cranked Anvil, Five:2:One, On the Run, Streetlight Magazine, and more. Kay lives in Seattle dodging raindrops, and loves Motown music.

SHOSHAUNA SHY: Why Not Nick or Jack?

Amusing, Artistic, Submissions, , , , , ,

His mother loved the melody of leaves flapping in the woods beside Nickajack Lake where she camped on summer nights, so she named him Aspen. He’d grow up tall, she decided. Sturdy. He believed her till age six when he heard his name on boys’ lips shouted across a playground.

Shoshauna loves how flash fiction cuts to the chase, and is grateful to find stories all over the place.

JOHN HOLMES: Hiding Pain

Amusing, Submissions, Touching, , , ,

Pelvis pressed to the parquet.
Shoulder shoved against the skirting.
Back braced by the bookcase.
Calves caught in computer cords.

Legs — dead.
Eyes — shut.
Breath — shallow.
Mind — counting.

‘Ninety-seven.
Ninety-eight.
Ninety-nine.

One hundred.’

A young, cheerful voice from the kitchen:

“Coming. Ready or not.”

Find me.

Please find me. Quickly.

John’s recent work has been published in People’s Friend, Five Minutes, Paragraph Planet, WestWord and FFF. He’s the author of ‘Rough Rides’, ‘Short and Sweet and Sour’ and ‘Whole In My Shorts’, and the winner of The Times, Fusilli, Self-Pub Fest, and Microcosms story competitions. John cycles the east coast of England soaking up new stories.

DAVID SYDNEY: Moth Toast

Amusing, Submissions, , , , , , ,

“What’re you doing, Ed?”

He motioned for quiet, crumpling a napkin. “This moth’s toast.”

The insect was on the kitchen table.

“Don’t kill it, Ed. It has a life too.”

Life? Too? His face twisted.

After he released it into their backyard, it was almost immediately eaten by a bird.

David Sydney is a physician who writes fiction in and out of the EHR (Electronic Health Record).

SIMON BUCKLEY: Concerns Have Been Raised

Amusing, Submissions, , ,

Hi Leo.

Yes, the exhibition install was fine!

The issue we’re having is the wall text has raised concerns about your artwork.

Thing is, we’ve realised it’s correct.

I’m afraid the situation has changed.

It’s now just the wall text on display.

See you at 8.

The wall text insisted.

Simon Buckley is a Glasgow-based writer and visual artist. His interdisciplinary practice explores language, rurality and non-human intelligence. He is co-coordinator of the action research group Durty Beanz, and his artwork and writing has been exhibited and published by galleries, museums and institutions internationally. His flash fiction has appeared in MAP Magazine, with forthcoming work in BULL.

JOHN H. DROMEY: The Nature of Nomenclature

Amusing, Submissions, ,

Space—the final frontier for verbal obfuscation.

Onboard a starship through nepotism, George has no formal training as an astronaut.

“Is there a rec room?” he asks.

“We have a holodeck,” he’s told.

Subsequently, George spends a lot of his leisure time in the cargo hold.

The ship’s hollow deck.

John H. Dromey has had short fiction, humor, and poetry published in many different venues.

TOM MAHER: The Weight of Words

Amusing, Artistic, Submissions, , , ,

A fly bookmarked pages six and seven. The last reader, inattentive or overawed, flattened it into a full stop. Maybe, having cut a life short, they couldn’t read again. Or perhaps the fly crawled in for warmth and got crushed by the weight of the words. Hemingway is heavy stuff.

Tom Maher is a writer from London who was shortlisted for the 2025 Bridport Prize.

LAUREN GIROD: Hydroplaning

Amusing, Submissions, , ,

Calling your insurance is a careful dance. I was driving in the Goldilocks zone for my bald tires to slip on I-20, yes, but I didn’t ask for it. Could you please pay off my totaled car? The APR was 18.9%, the tires were completely bald, and I hated the color.

Lauren Girod is a Narrative Designer from Atlanta, Georgia. She is compelled to write about everything, so long as her words permit it. Her work has appeared in Outrageous Fortune, The Crawfish, Bardics Anonymous, and 45th Parallel.

NORMAN MARCOTTE: Scholastic Encounter

Amusing, Submissions, , , , ,

“What’s the matter, dear?” Helen says as Mark enters the house, crying. “Did something happen at school again?”

“Someone threw a spitball at the back of my head when I was writing on the board,” Mark replies, wiping his nose clean.

“Maybe you should start using Powerpoint when you teach.”

Norman Marcotte is retired and enjoys spending his free time exercising his creative brain. You can find more of his writing at normanmarcotte.com.

SIMON BUCKLEY: The Invitational

Amusing, Submissions, , ,

Every slinky dreams of a staircase like this. But for Bobby, the dream was about to become real. It hadn’t come easy. Escalator camps. Winters at Mount Niesen. He looked down at the stairs and up to the fluttering banner: THE M. C. ESCHER INVITATIONAL. He began to fall. Forever.

Simon Buckley is a contemporary visual artist based in Glasgow, Scotland. His interdisciplinary practice explores language, rurality and non-human intelligence. He is currently a co-director of the Action Research group Durty Beanz. His work is exhibited and published by galleries, museums and biennales across the world.