Australia, the young man knew,
Held many things for him to do
And proud Brazil, whose flag was green,
Was filled with things that he had seen
He’d studied well the Paris streets
Some day, he said, he’d visit Greece
A wanderer, he called himself
Exploring books upon his shelf
Gazelle raised her royal head. “Having overcome the Lioness, our foe, you will now be granted your reward.”
Rhino nodded graciously. “I thank thee,” he rumbled.
Gazelle signalled Monkey, who draped a necklace of brown jasper around Rhino’s prodigious neck.
Rhino smiled softly. The stones matched his lovely Lioness’s eyes.
Rammy won the 2011 Valentine’s Day contest with the following entry:
Of course they look alike; they’re sisters.
Coincidentally, I met them on Valentine’s Day and immediately fell in love, and now they live with me.
It was through a want ad: “New in town. Looking for friends, a litter box, and meow mix.”
I named my kittens Always and Forever.
Rammy Meyerowitz is a Puzzle Person and a Cultural Marginal, as well as a jewish atheist and a secular humanist.
Daniel earned runner up honours in the Valentine’s Day contest with this story:
I am a robot in love with a human.
One day she walked past.
“Level of fine: incalculable.”
She be like, “Oh please, honey, you a robot.”
I said, “Be my Valentine, and I will love you always and forever.”
“I’ll pass.”
I pinched her booty and she left me.
Daniel Watson graduated from Florida State University last April with a degree in English creative writing and philosophy. He now lives in Greenville, South Carolina, where he is a project proposal editor for a corporation called Fluor.
Editor’s Note: For the best experience, try reading this story out loud to someone while doing character voices!
Derek’s story earned second runner up in the 50WS Valentine’s Day contest:
“Do you love me?”
They were young, and she laughed. “Zero. Computers can’t love, silly.”
Eons passed. They were alone, together. As entropy drained the last drops of energy in the universe, he strained to ask the question one last time.
“Do you love me?”
“One. Always and forever.”
Derek Mullanari is a teenager who enjoys writing science fiction.
“Hello, my friend!” twinkled Sir William Glowingsmile. “How are we this fine evening?”
Captain Scowlyface glared at the pompous fancypants so sourly that Glowingsmile turned around and took a swig of mouthwash.
“I see,” Sir William continued. “And your wife?”
Captain Scowlyface frowned so menacingly that Glowingsmile’s toupee fell off.
It was very important to Monika that she raise her children right. She taught them Kindness, and Hospitality, and Manners, and Decency.
But setting a good example wasn’t always enough, so she sometimes snuck a squirt of dish soap into her baking, just in case they’d been using naughty words.
This story was based on a title suggested by @BRSsexyman.
“Tonight we shall incur the esteem of our ancestors!” bellowed King Tawnyfeathers as his eager army growled in anticipation.
But his heart wasn’t in this fight. He wished he were lying in his garden, gazing at the clouds, interred in the earth he had cultivated.
Ah, to be a potato…
This story was based on a title suggestion by Claire Martin via Facebook.
“Aww, where’s mommy?” they teased. “Is baby homesick?”
And she dried her tears and lied to them.
“I’m not homesick,” she shouted, and that wasn’t the lie.
“I don’t care about my mommy,” she protested, and that wasn’t the lie.
“Leave me alone!” she screamed, and that was the lie.
This story was based on a title suggested by Dan Hingston through the Facebook page.
He poked the box. It giggled.
He shook it. It squeaked.
He pushed it across the table. It burped.
He patted the top of it. It whistled.
He shook his head. Why is it making noises? He stared at it.
“You could just open me, you know,” it muttered moodily.
Laura Graham poses as a fourth-year Japanese student, but mostly uses it as an excuse to wander around Edinburgh in four-inch high heels, confusing friends and strangers alike, and letting her creative side out before it’s shackled to a dead-end job when reality bites. She also likes knitting and tea.
Editor: Also, her bio is exactly fifty words long. Hooray!