“Pick a pig,” said the farmer. “Oh, Pig 3’s half price.”

Suzanna surveyed the oinking, grunting shapes wallowing in the sty. “Are you sure they’re all actually pigs?”

“‘Course I’m sure. I ain’t no swindler!”

“I only ask,” said Suzanna, “because Pig 3 looks like a stump with a tape recorder.”

This story is based on a title suggested by Michelle Sevenhuysen via Facebook.