The bus driver was in a hurry to finish his night shift; wife was about to deliver their baby.
A man was slowly walking towards the stop, waving his hand weakly. “Probably drunk,” the driver thought, annoyed, closed the doors, and left.
And so one life ended and another began.
Katya Duft is a translator, interpreter, and language teacher; is fluent in Russian and French; and enjoys writing stories and poetry.
Given Tim’s recent approval of constructive criticism, I thought I would suggest two things. First, so that you might have a modifier in front of “wife,” (which I think would make it read a smidge better) I would say “his wife” and change the verb of the following sentence from “was slowly walking” to “slowly walked” to save yourself a word so you could have the modifier. I also think that the “,” following “Probably drunk” should be inside the quotation marks and read “Probably drunk,”. These are minor suggestions for what I think is a great story succinctly told. I love the concept of the small decisions in life, the assumptions we make, having far greater effects than we know. I often wonder what I have done or haven’t done that may have led to events of which I am unaware – both good and bad.
Thank you, Beth, what you suggested makes a lot of sense