For Sale:

Slightly used lamp, Genie included. Two wishes remaining. Rub with caution. Stand back when lit. Resident is temperamental, prone to scratching and biting due to late-onset dementia. Perfect for small fantasies and unimaginative people.

Warning: love and power wishes are exempt.

Price is negotiable. Will trade for PS4.

David is an avid writer and recently won his first competition.