Tag Archives: funny

DEAN MARRINER: Cocklaphobia

Amusing, Submissions, , ,

Inside the girl’s head a fear grew larger.

As she stood waiting she wrestled with it. She fought it. It kept returning.

She glanced at her reflection and liked what she saw. It did suit her, after all.

Inside her head the fear of hats faded and she breathed again.

Dean Marriner is a production director at a design company in Newcastle, UK. He spends his spare time drawing pictures on old books and has only recently started writing mini sagas.

Editor’s Note: Cocklaphobia is the commonly accepted name for a “fear of hats”.

DAVID WING: Found – Please Take

Stories, ,

A rather short gentleman.

Answers to the name Shamus.

Wears an emerald green suit, a buckled hat and black shoes and won’t stop smoking his pipe in the house.

Keeps on about his pot of gold but refuses to kick in for the groceries.

If he’s yours, please claim — soon.

 David is a writing student, has had work published on a few sites, and seems to be on a supernatural kick at the moment.

ANN SANGWIN: Moustache Misery

Amusing, Submissions, , ,

“I don’t know what all the fuss is about,” she said as he peered again in the mirror. “Everyone grows one soon enough, and then you’ll spend the rest of your life fighting it.”

He stared at the luxuriant growth on his Great Aunt’s upper lip.

Life is so unfair.

Ann Sangwin is a retired teacher, now a career grandmother. She has written all her life but until recently has not thought of submitting for publication. She lives in Kent and is part of a writing group, which has changed her life.

JOHN H DROMEY: Lacking in Conviction

Amusing, Puns and Wordplay, Submissions, , , ,

“Nine-one-one. What is your emergency?”

“My boyfriend dumped me.”

“I’m sorry, Miss, but ending a relationship is not an illegal activity. There’s nothing I can do for you.”

“What about Phil’s smooth talking and handsome good looks? Can’t you arrest him for possession of burglary tools? He stole my heart!”

John H. Dromey had his story “Hunger Gamesmanship” posted at Stupefying Stories Showcase.

BARRY O’FARRELL: Any Publicity is Good Publicity

Amusing, Submissions, , , , , ,

The promotion to name our giraffe is going terrifically well. The enthusiasm and excitement generated amongst the general public is way above our expectation.

In fact, the only promotion I can think of which has been more successful was the very first one we ran to help name our unicorn.

Barry O’Farrell is an actor living in Brisbane, Australia. More of his work can be found in Cyclamens & Swords and A Story In 100 Words.

JD HAGER: Running Late

Amusing, Submissions, , ,

Doc Brody was late for the appointment, which had clearly been scheduled for high noon. He had personally requested promptness. “Don’t be late,” he’d said. How unprofessional. How inconsiderate. Was his time somehow more valuable than mine?

Really, what kind of self-respecting outlaw shows up late for a gun fight?

J.D. Hager lives in Northern California with his wife and a small collection of animals. When not writing short stories he goes undercover as a middle school science teacher. More words can be found at jdhager.wordpress.com.

JT GILL: I Wish

Amusing, Submissions, , ,

“Please don’t make this harder than it has to be, Alan.”

“Sarah, listen to me. I want to make this work.”

“I can’t.”

“Why not? What have they done to you in here?”

“I love you, Alan, but you have to go. I’m not supposed to have imaginary friends anymore.”

JT Gill is a 21-year-old college student in Virginia. His work has appeared in Nanoism, and many more publications will soon be inserted into this part of the bio. He writes quite often.

RUBY RAY: Early Proposal

Amusing, Submissions, , , ,

“Darling, you can’t marry your Teddy Bear.”

“Why not?”

“He’s not real.”

“Of course he’s real. You tell me to talk to him when I can’t sleep. Anyway, I’m not marrying anyone else.”

“Darling, you’ll find someone just like your Daddy.”

“Exactly. I’m marrying Ted as soon as I’m eight.”

Ruby Ray has been a Jill of many trades and mistress of some of them. Anyway, she hopes to have mastered (mistressed?) a few more before she takes it easy for good.

BARBARA COMSTOCK: How to Annoy the Tooth Fairy

Amusing, Submissions, , , ,

The Tooth Fairy had visited and left $5 for that first tooth. Later, Chloe wrote this note, all phonetically:

“Dear Tooth Fairy,

You took my tooth, but you didn’t leave any money. Please leave it tonight.

Love, Chloe.”

She winked me a smile. “Tooth Fairy’s so busy, she won’t remember!”

Barbara Comstock teaches English Language Arts in middle school and is easily amused.

KERRY DONOVAN: The Fickleness of Women

Amusing, Submissions, ,

I had the full set—beard and moustache—all through the 1990s and shaved for the millennium.

My wife and daughter screamed.

“Grow it back,” said my wife.

“You look fat,” said my daughter.

I grew a goatee for Movember 2014. Now my wife won’t kiss me until it’s gone.

An Irishman living in Brittany, Kerry is the author of the DCI Jones Casebook series of crime thrillers. Check his website for details.