A merman wearing a seaweed waistcoat burst from the water and landed in our gondola, showering us with spray.

“Marry him, you idiot!” he yelled, then dived back into the canal.

Drenched and bewildered, Mary nodded weakly as I got down on one knee for the second time that day.

Mark Farley writes novels, flash fiction, and the occasional poem. Find him on twitter at @mumbletoes.