Category Archives: Amusing

BOB THURBER: Dizzy Spells

Amusing, Submissions, Top Stories, Touching, , , ,

My father called from somewhere.

He needed to sign some important documents and he’d forgotten his name again.

I asked where he was, I asked where he’d been.

I asked if he was alright, if he was wearing shoes and clothes.

He said, Just spell my name for me, son.

Bob Thurber is the author of “Paperboy: A Dysfunctional Novel” and two collections of stories. A celebrated master of Flash and Micro Fiction, his work has appeared in 60 anthologies, received dozens of awards, and been used in schools and colleges throughout the world. He resides in Massachusetts where, though legally blind, he continues to write every day. Visit his website at BobThurber.net.

RON. LAVALETTE: 14-Year-Old Pediatrician

Amusing, Submissions, , ,

I saved my little sister’s life.
She had a bad case
of deadly Arphidarfilus.

She sought a second opinion.
Mom was busy in the kitchen.
Dad was, as always, on the road.

I prescribed gumdrops.
(Gumdrops is the only cure.)

Half a century later
she says I’m still her hero.

Ron. Lavalette has been widely published in both print and pixel forms. His first chapbook is now available from Finishing Line Press, and a reasonable sample of his work can be found at EGGS OVER TOKYO.

DAVID MARK WILLIAMS: Protected Species

Amusing, Odd, Submissions, , , ,

I didn’t know what it was at first, wings folded, very still. A bat expert told me I couldn’t get rid of it. “It’s a protected species.”

Veronica left after a week. She wasn’t prepared to share a house with a creature like that.

It’s just me and Boris now.

David Mark Williams lives in Scotland and writes poetry and short fiction. He has completed two poetry collections to date: The Odd Sock Exchange and Papaya Fantasia. See more at davidmarkwilliams.co.uk.

JOHN H. DROMEY: ‘Tis the Season for Frights

Amusing, Submissions, ,

All Hallows Eve. The most popular haunted house in town was as dark as the inside of an uncarved pumpkin. Not one of its clockwork creatures was stirring.

Why?

The property was under new management. The penny-pinching promoter took one look at his scary electric bill and pulled the plug.

John H. Dromey has a story “Cross Genre Traffic Does Not Stop” reprinted online in Unfit Magazine.

Editor: I should have re-titled this story “Who Turned Out the Frights?”

MARY GUNN: Paws For Thought

Amusing, Submissions, , , ,

He needed a home. I let him move in. Bought a new bed. Fed him well. Tended to his every need. Let him sit by a real coal fire.

But every time I turned my back, he sneaked off to the woman down the road.

He was just another tom.

Mary Gunn writes short stories and poetry, including Japanese-style poems. She lives on the east coast of Ireland.

PERRY McDAID: Avalanche Retro

Amusing, Poetry, Submissions, , ,

Soul-pain and heartache of days that are gone:
festering things fed by dread and dismay
pounding dark avalanche rolls on and on.

I am its echo, recording per se,
an hour’s background static in the green aisle
rumbling I’ve NOTHING TO DECLARE. Make way

For this humble outmoded cassette tape.

Irish writer Perry McDaid lives in Derry under the brooding brows of Donegal hills which he occasionally hikes in search of druidic inspiration. He even finds it on occasion.

TA YOUNG: The Near-Perfect Timeline

Amusing, Artistic, Submissions, , , , , ,

When Heinrich did not die at the apex of his actuarial bell curve, he felt intense relief; blessed. He loved his world as he never had; he felt the breeze as he sat on his deck overlooking the mountains; he squeezed the hand of his spouse

for one sublime second.

T.A. Young’s short story “Stooped” was published in The First Line magazine, summer issue 2017. His poetry appears in the October 2018 issue of Anti-Heroin Chic. You can find his literary reviews on his Instagram page, #thelitreview. He lives and works in New York City.

JOHANNA B STUMPF: Chicken

Amusing, Odd, Submissions, , ,

“They grew a new veggie,” Jane announced excitedly. “It’s supposed to taste like fried chicken. Wanna go and try some?”

“And if it’s no good, we’ll get diarrhea again,” Clara replied dryly.

“Come on, that hasn’t happened since the eggplant incident. And they just didn’t boil the eggs long enough.”

Johanna B. Stumpf is a German millennial, living and working in Norway. She is fairly new to fiction writing, but she did enough academic writing to earn a PhD in Computer Science from the University of Oslo.

DENNY E MARSHALL: Head Games

Amusing, Submissions, , , ,

Leroy orders online. Two weeks later the package arrives.

It is a head that looks exactly like Leroy.

When his work robot arrives home, he removes its head and replaces it with the new one.

Leroy will wait a month and then try to talk the robot into trading places.

Denny E. Marshall has had art, poetry, and fiction published, including fiction in Night To Dawn October 2018. See more at dennymarshall.com.

HENRY BLADON: Homophones

Amusing, Puns and Wordplay, Submissions, , , ,

Misha suddenly said: “I don’t like homophones.”

I asked her why not.

“Because they’re dangerous,” she said.

“Do you mean ‘people who are anti-gay?'” I asked.

She laughed. “Oh, yeah. Wrong word.”

I agreed with her anyway.

Then I wondered weather she wished she had rather not said that allowed.

Henry lives in Somerset in the UK. He likes jazz flute.