He appeared out of the shadows. “Money,” he demanded, his knife cutting down the need for explanatory conversation.

Panicking, I explained I had no job, no life, and definitely no money. He apologised for bothering me and left.

I punched the air happily. The air took it like a man.

This week’s guest story comes from Jamie Middleton. He declined to attach a tagline or description of himself, which leads me to believe that he is either celebrity, a secret agent, or both. Rock on, Jamie!