Grinning, Earl invaded Gomper Hall, sporting a fuchsia waistcoat with orange-striped breeches, a feathered fez. His belt had bells!

Earl slapped distinguished backs, strutted past mouths agape, open as though for fishhooks. Gentlemen fanned woozy ladies.

Earl was removed.

(Nobody expected that heist. We’re still taking inventory of the loot!)

C.B. Auder might someday dream of a life jam-packed with flexi-twill cuffs and apricot capes.