MOUSTACHE MEMOIRS: Connell Wayne Regner – The Prowess of the Sexy Moustache

Amusing, Moustache Memoirs, ,

“What happened to your moustache?”

“It just got up and left.”

“What kind of crazy talk is that?”

“Look, all I’m saying is when push came to shove it got pretty hairy. I told her to choose between me and my moustache, and go figure, she chose the moustache.”

“Rrright…”

Connell acknowledges the sex appeal of the moustache in the 1970s and has dared to answer the question, “What if….?” in this disturbing and dubious tale of hairy proportions. Connell has requested that comments, if any, be kept as cheesy as possible in keeping with the theme.

MOUSTACHE MEMOIRS: Peter Li-Ping – Gloop of the Day

Amusing, Moustache Memoirs, , ,

This guy in the restaurant had actually drunk straight from his soup bowl, leaving a neat pea-green soup moustache. Rolling up his sleeves to attack the main course, he’d splattered food up to his elbows. Watching him in the mirror, I supposed I really should address his lack of manners.

Peter Li-ping has yet to see an attractive moustache. He feels, however, that they are better than tattoos because they can be shaved off. Except when someone tattoos a moustache on themselves, which is really weird.

STORY OF THE WEEK: November 22

News

The story of the week for November 17 to 21 is Commuting by Anton Rose.

As someone who takes public transit to work every day, I appreciate the truth that underlies this story’s dark humour. On trains and buses, and in crowds in general, we get so buried in our bubbles of personal space. The fact that this story could essentially be true is what makes it effective. Congratulations Anton!

ANN SANGWIN: Silence

Artistic, Submissions, , , , ,

He stands where his father put him, white faced, tears staining his cheeks, little fists clenched at his side, listening to the silence. His mother’s stifled screams, moans, and sobs have stopped.

He is trembling, frozen with fear, eyes fixed on the belt hanging on the back of the door.

Ann Sangwin is a retired teacher, now a career grandmother. She has written all her life but until recently has not thought of submitting for publication. She lives in Kent, where she recently joined a writing group which has changed her life.

DIANA WAGNER: The Hard Talk With My Gut

Amusing, Submissions, , , , ,

I’ve always been told to trust you. But you only entice me to make bad decisions, like eating Taco Bell after midnight. Then you spend hours punishing me!

And now you’re telling me to quit my job to become a novelist?

This isn’t working. I’m leaving you for my Head.

Diana Wagner loves to write and read and watch and think about stories.

CATHERINE MATHEWS: Brothers

Amusing, Submissions, Touching, , , , ,

Georgi, by 15 months the older brother, would say, “Bori, bring the toys,” and Bori, heeding authority’s voice, hastened to comply.

Now, in their eighties, their relationship has not changed.

When Georgi thinks it’s time for lunch, Bori, though slowed by age, limps to the kitchen to bring the sandwiches.

Catherine Mathews is a State Department retiree formerly stationed overseas in Paris, Rome, Tel Aviv, Athens, Frankfurt, and Istanbul. She is now living in Northern Virginia and writing about her life.

ANTON ROSE: Commuting

Amusing, Odd, Submissions, Top Stories, , , , ,

A chap started speaking to me on the train this morning. He told me he had just killed his wife, shot her twice in the head, and was off to Bristol to kill again.

I turned to the sports section in the newspaper.

England Lose By Six Wickets.

Bloody typical.

Anton lives in Durham, U.K. He writes fiction and poetry while trying to finish a PhD, all fueled by numerous cups of tea. Find him at antonrose.com or @antonjrose.

CORINNA ROGERS: Goodbye

Submissions, Touching, , , ,

[Ella has entered text]

I can’t close the chat, even though it’s been almost four months since the cremation. I check the bottom of that box like the morning paper, like it gives my life meaning. I thought nothing could hurt more. Today I’ll close the chat.

[Ella is typing]

Corinna lives in North Carolina with a loving partner and a herd of cats. She is the author of the Myths & Mortals trilogy, published by Harper Impulse.

RH PALMER: Drowning

Submissions, Touching, ,

I don’t interrupt; that would be rude.

She’s telling me the same story of nearly drowning that I’ve heard before. She’s determined to squeeze out every memory before it’s gone.

Like my mother’s boxed wine, her memories have slowly dripped out onto the floor, and she doesn’t even know it.

R. H. Palmer lives in Southern Illinois and spends her free time listening to old records and terrorizing her cats.

FRANK SOLOMON: The Heirloom

Amusing, Submissions, Touching, , , , , ,

The white gold, worn thin by years, cut her grandmother’s cold finger as Julia removed it. Her tears caught the diamond’s fire.

“She wanted you to have it,” Pops said.

“I miss her already.”

“Me too, Babe.” He held Julia close and kissed her head.

“…How much is it worth?”

Frank Solomon retired from the University of Kentucky after 30 years as a Systems Programmer and now pursues his many passions from his home in Kentucky. http://www.franksolomon.com.