Tag Archives: food



“Eat up!” said Mom.

Victor stared at his plate. Yuck. What was this slimy, moldy, mushy gunk?

“Don’t you like it?”

“Gross!” said Victor. “Is this rotten food?”

“It’s your winnings,” said Mom. “The ones you gloated about after Monopoly. Like you said, to the victor go the spoils!”

I’m happy to announce the birth of my second son, Victor! This story is for him.

The Italian Mouse

“Please, Clarissa,” pleaded Sergio, “don’t leave me! I’ll make you better spaghetti, better pizza, better wine!”

“Always food with you,” said Clarissa wearily. “Always wine… Don’t you understand me? What I really want are children… and pets!”

Sergio bought her a mouse. She kept it, and got rid of him.

The Waffler Conspiracy

“I don’t know…”

I gritted my teeth. “Make up your mind! I can’t stand your waffling.”

“Both options look good!” she protested. “I hate being forced to choose…”

“Here,” I said, “I’ll choose for you.” I flung a waffle onto her plate.

“But,” she said, “maybe I want a pancake…”

This story is based on a title suggested by @PoshPlatypus.

It Will All Come Back

A leering face, a dark alley, and a tangy, salty-sweet flavour were all he could remember when he awoke in the hospital bed.

The contents of his wallet said he was Josip Šerić, a wealthy Croatian businessman visiting Chicago.

He didn’t care. All that mattered was finding back that flavour.