Tag Archives: heifer

GEORGE 8: Sheep go to Heaven, Cyborgs go to Hell

The heifer chewed her cud. It was thicker than yesterday’s. Oh, what was that? There was something crunchy in her mouth. Cud wasn’t supposed to crunch. Had she eaten something unusual? The heifer couldn’t remember.

In the burning depths of Hades, Cyborg George massaged his seething soul, already plotting revenge.

THE END

(Or is it?)

George 7: This Ends Now

Whirring, spinning, and hissing, Cyborg George advanced towards the unimpressed heifer, who stood at the fence chewing her cud.

“This ends NOW!” cried George, cocking the shotgun mounted on his arm. He raised his metallic arm high. “NOW!”

As if on cue, a bolt of lightning burst from the sky.

GEORGE 6: Some Modifications

Twelve ravens watched as the door of the farmhouse opened and a grime-smeared figure emerged.

His left leg was steel and pistons; steam whiffed out of the joints as he moved. A shotgun was mounted along his handless right forearm.

“Death, death, raawk!” croaked the ravens.

Cyborg George laughed aloud.

GEORGE 4: A True Omnivore

The heifer chewed her cud.

That funny one-legged man stood in front of her, holding some kind of metal tube and balancing precariously on a crutch.

Now he was pointing the metal thing at her forehead. It smelled delicious.

Later, in the farm house, George softly rubbed his bandaged hand.

GEORGE 1: The Innocence of Bovinity

The heifer chewed her cud. It was thicker than yesterday’s. Oh, what was that? There was something crunchy in her mouth. Cud wasn’t supposed to crunch. Had she eaten something unusual this afternoon? The heifer couldn’t remember.

In the farm house, George softly rubbed his bandaged stump, already plotting revenge.