Tag Archives: alcoholics anonymous

DAVID S ATKINSON: The Fox-Trot Is Not One of the Twelve Steps

Amusing, Submissions, , ,

Hi, I’m Jim and I’m here because of the damn judge. See… I sleep naked and don’t dress until after breakfast and coffee. So I took the coffee pot and griddle out of their boxes, new as they were, and got started. The people at that Walmart were sure mad.

David S. Atkinson is the author of “Apocalypse All the Time” (forthcoming 2017), “Not Quite so Stories,” “The Garden of Good and Evil Pancakes” (2015 National Indie Excellence Awards finalist in humor), and “Bones Buried in the Dirt” (2014 Next Generation Indie Book Awards finalist, First Novel <80K). His writing appears in "Bartleby Snopes," "Grey Sparrow Journal," "Atticus Review," and others. Check out his writing website.

LUCY Q WILLIAMS: One Drink

Artistic, Submissions, ,

Refusing would be antisocial. Plus, it’s his treat. I’m late for my meeting though. Still, I can have one drink with him and then be on my way. I’ll just make this call first and tell them I’m running late tonight.

I pulled out my phone and called my sponsor.

Lucy Q. Williams is a social worker from the Hampton Roads area of Virginia. When she is not writing, she’s thinking about it. She is currently working on her first novel and tracks her progress on her blog at LucyQWilliams.com.

JOSCELYN WILLETT: The Assignment

Amusing, Submissions, ,

She scanned the classroom filled with adults looking for a second chance at life, predicting her neighbor’s answer: My name is Dan Clark and I am an alcoholic.

Then she bowed her head and scrawled her own upon the notebook: I am someone who cannot describe herself in ten words.

Joscelyn Willett consistently has trouble deciding which ice cream flavor to order, so always orders chocolate. It’s a solid choice.

Sponsorship

Amusing, Puns and Wordplay, , , , , , , ,

“Hello?”

“Hey man.” I could hear Marv’s half-baked grin through the phone.

I sighed. “Fall off the wagon again?”

“Kinda! I’m still sober, but I broke my hip falling off a hay ride, and I’m suing big! Awesome, eh? Gonna miss some meetings.”

Being Marv’s sponsor drove me to drink.

This story was based on the TypeTrigger prompt “falling off the.”

Everything in Moderation

Amusing, , , , , ,

“Hi. My name is Jeferee, and I’m a ruleaholic.”

Everyone intoned, “Hi Jeferee.”

“I think it began when my parents named me. I mean, my name actually rhymes with ‘referee’…”

The others nodded sympathetically.

“I’m here to get help.”

“We’ll have you jaywalking again in no time!” said his sponsor.