Tag Archives: tan

Stay Out of the Sun

Charlie the Cow was allergic to leather. He had to stay out of the sun, because if he stood in the sun for too long his skin would get tanned.

…Get it? His skin would gettanned? Like, y’know, it would turn into leather. And he was allergic to leather…

Priorities in a Time of Global Crisis

Kim groaned and awoke.

It was early morning, but unusually bright and hot.

Kim slipped into her bathrobe, flung open the blinds, and screamed.

A dying red sun filled the sky. Earth’s orbit was rapidly, dangerously contracting.

Kim shrieked and hammered on her speed-dial. “Tan-Hut!? I need a pre-tan NOW!”