“Who’s that trip-trapping over my bridge?”
The three billygoats prepared to flee.
“There’s a toll!” said the troll.
“Is that all?” said Mother Goat. “How much is it?”
“An arm and a leg,” said the troll. “Or two legs, in your case.”
Now the goats have to drag themselves everywhere.
This story was based on the TypeTrigger prompt “takes a toll.”
The Lime Bandit was finally in handcuffs.
As they tossed him in the police car, they struggled to discover the origin behind his namesake (his crimes were never lime-related at all) but he just laughed.
They would find out soon enough; the strategically hidden tick nests would be mature soon.
Brandon is an undergraduate student with no online presence whatsoever. He’ll start up a webcomic eventually, though. How’s that for dedication?
“Hello?”
“Hey man.” I could hear Marv’s half-baked grin through the phone.
I sighed. “Fall off the wagon again?”
“Kinda! I’m still sober, but I broke my hip falling off a hay ride, and I’m suing big! Awesome, eh? Gonna miss some meetings.”
Being Marv’s sponsor drove me to drink.
This story was based on the TypeTrigger prompt “falling off the.”
“It’s a sand witch!” I shouted. “Run!”
My warning came too late. She caught us in her magical snares and turned us into camels.
It took three years to escape, and two more to find a wizard who could change us back. On the upside, I kept the water retention.
This story was based on the TypeTrigger prompt “it’s a sandwich.”
“Do you have Polygons for sale?”
“Certainly, sir!”
“Excellent. They’re just what I need to solve my problem. You see, lately it’s felt like part of me is missing…”
“Very strange. And you think new Polygons will help?”
“Probably not, but I hope they’ll at least solve my parrot infestation.”
“You have been a great comfort to me, softening the hard times and cushioning the blows. Without your support, I would have found it much more challenging to sleep on so many difficult nights.”
With these words, and a waterfall of tears, I eulogized my dear, old friend, the sofa.
Lightning crashed.
Wind whistled through the trees. He was only halfway through Greensleeves before Lightning asked if whistling was not maybe just a bit too jaunty, given their predicament.
Wind complied as he helped his friend untangle himself from his airbag. “Just try not to crash so hard next time.”
Jeremy Petter is a student of English Literature and Theatre at the University of Victoria. Until recently, he wrote, performed, and sometimes edited funny things for LoadingReadyRun.com, but he’s on indefinite hiatus at the moment to grow his brain. He is a co-organizer of Desert Bus for Hope, and an avid fan of ducks.
Melinda was a contrarian: she even became a tomboy just to prove the midwife wrong.
She was an anti-Earth activist, campaigning against her parents’ environmental research. Her slogan was “Green thumb; grass knuckles.”
They told her punching the ground didn’t actually hurt Mother Nature, which made her hit it harder.
This story is based on a title suggested by @KingKool.
One day Bruce Wayne brought Dick Grayson to the Gotham City Zoo.
While they were there, they got caught up in, and foiled, a mobster’s nefarious mammal-smuggling scheme.
“This city is full of animals,” said Batman.
It was that kind of writing that threatened to kill the comic book industry.
This story is based on a title suggested by @Wear_Wolf.
“Will she be faithful? I must find out.”
“I can divine the future from anything you own – pass me that jug from your breakfast table.”
“Whoops! Sorry! Thought it was empty…”
“Idiot! Your fate cannot now be foreseen.”
“Why?”
“All men know: there’s no use scrying over spilled milk.”
Nick Johns lives in Sandhurst, UK. A retired cat wrestler, he now breeds mongrel flash fictions for release into the wild.